CORONA TIPS
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Day 1: I'm BORED!
My face is frozen, PLUS Mike Pence and Joel Osteen, work has stopped in the White House ... and my quarantine in my Glam Room!
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Day 2: Arby's Free Delivery
Melania's latest Coronavirus White House update: Arby's delivered by catapult, Mike Pence converts to Catholicism, and how to get Donald Trump to wash his hands.
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Day 3: Kellyanne in a Bunker and Mike Pence Burns a Rainbow Flag!
BREAKING NEWS: Melania finds out why Kellanne Conway was locked in a White House bunker. Mike Pence responds to Rand Paul getting #Corona!
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Day 4: Mike Pence converts to Santeria and KFC Delivery by Carrier Pigeon!
The Arby's catapult breaks so they turn to carrier pigeon and Mike Pence's suprising turn. PLUS Melania becomes more relatable to ordinary Americans!
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Day 5: Mike Pence Sacrifices a Chicken!
Mike Pence continues to take desperate measure to cure the Coronavirus. PLUS a special update from Secret Service Agent Johnson Smith!
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Day 6: Mitch McConnell is on the White House Lawn!
Mitch McConnell is stranded on the White House lawn! And Mike Pence gets everyone in the White House sick!
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Day 7: Mike Pence is Trying to Kill Us!
Press secretary Ula Uberbusen fills in while Melania runs from the Pence Bird Flu.
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Day 8: Melania Trumps in Cahoots with Lesbians!
Melania makes a mistake about her cyrogenic pod, then decides to have a party with lesbians so they will expand her Glam Room.
See the virtual version of the show, presented by Curve Magazine, by registering here.
See the virtual version of the show, presented by Curve Magazine, by registering here.
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Day 9: The REAL REASON Don't Won't Give NY 30,000 Ventilators
Mike Pence converted to Pentecostal Snake Handler to cure Bird Flu. And the REAL REASON won't give NY 30,000 ventilators.
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Day 10: Melania's Emergency Call
Melania calls in an S.O.S. ... about painting her nails. And she gets a mysterious call.
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Day 11: Donald Breaks a Record
Donald breaks a record not touched since the Spanish Flu Epidemic. PLUS Melania is missing her afternoon parsnip!
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Day 12: Rudy Giuliani is IMMUNE to Corona
Donald is furious at Pence for cutting off his supply of KFC. Rudy Giuliani can not get Corona but he continues to lurk around the White House annoying everyone with goblin riddles.
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Day 13: Melania is Attacked!
Donald's phone is contaminated so Hope Hicks is hired to distract him with cleavage. PLUS Mike Pence screws up again. He releases a pack of wild mongooses who make an attack on Melania!
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Day 14: Mongoose ATTACK!
The Moongooses are out of control and Smith Johnson has to save the day!
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Day 15: Mongoose Domination!
The mongoose tribe is defeated! But can they help Melania get more mascara?
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Day 16: Spankings in the White House
Jared Kushner gets gang spanked and Mike Pence becomes a Flaggelator in the White House JFK Memorial Bondage Room.
With special guest Neil Rubenstein
With special guest Neil Rubenstein
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Day 17: Mike Pence Gets Bent Over
Mike Pence becomes a Shaker and Melania is worried she'll have to spend more more time being a mom!
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Day 18: Melania Has a Fantasy About Bernie Sanders
Bernie Sanders dropped out of the race and Melania finally feels comfortable reveling her fantasies about the octogenarian.
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Day 19: Donald Thinks Bernie is a Contestant on Survivor
Now that Bernie has dropped out, Donald has the CDC find the Immunity Idol for the final round against Biden. Mike Pence isn't so great at making Shaker furniture.
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Day 20: Ivanka Trump Pretends to Sew
Melania catches Ivanka Trump pretending to sew masks. PLUS Mike Pence gets kicked out of the Shaker religion.
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Day 21: How to Put on a Corona Mask
Essential tips to put on a Coronavirus mask! Stay safe against COVID-19
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Day 22: Donald's MELTDOWN Confession
Donald has a tantrum at a press conference yesterday and Melania reveals that it was all her fault! His food was cut in the wrong shapes! PLUS she tells us why Donald was busy in February.
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Day 23: Melania has an Existential Crisis
Melania has an existential crisis on the anniversary of Jean Paul Sartre's Death Day
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Day 24: VINNIE the Ventilator: Melania Reads
Melania reads her favorite children's book: VINNIE the Ventilator. A children's book for Corona.
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Day 25: Melania Trump Wrapped in a Chinese Flag?
Stephanie Grisham got a demotion and Melania has plans to get rid of her. She doesn't want anyone to hear about the "photo" of her in Chinese Hustler, wrapped in a Chinese Flag!
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Day 26: Pence Blowing Off Steam + Karen Freaks Out
Since being kicked out of Shaker religion Mike Pence has been spending his time in the JFK Memorial Bondage Room. Karen on a campaign to get him out of there!
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Day 27: Melania Trump Wears Handmaid's Tale Outfit
Texas opens bowling alleys but bans abortion. Mike Pence celebrates with Handmaid's Tale fashion.
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